Horrible Dreams and Wonderful Nightmares

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Sudy
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Horrible Dreams and Wonderful Nightmares

Post by Sudy »

Eugene Levy Made Me Look Like a Girl

My family took me to Ireland for a vacation. People frequently had a hard time with my accent, so I slowed my speech so they could read my lips. Apparently I was getting married in six months, so I needed to find someone who could trim my 1.5-year covid beard. Thankfully, there was a lone male stylist in the local salon who could do the job: Eugene Levy. He trimmed it shorter than I wanted, but the real issue was that he gave me blonde goldilocks curls and put long bright ribbons in my hair. Sometimes it seemed to be a post-apocalyptic, semi-recovered future. So here I am wandering some kind of concourse, extremely self-conscious about my appearance. I have my hearthstone, though I'm concerned this ancient technology is going to draw even more attention to me (apparently the far future isn't nearly as accepting of gender fluidity as we'd hoped). But of course the damn network doesn't exist anymore! So I've got to travel by boat like the rest of the schlubs.


As always, most details were left in the dreamscape.

I saw a commercial on late night TV. It said, "Forget everything you know about slipcovers." So I did. And it was a load off my mind. Then the commercial tried to sell me slipcovers, and I didn't know what the hell they were. -- Mitch Hedberg
Jeff V
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Re: Horrible Dreams and Wonderful Nightmares

Post by Jeff V »

Worst.cocktail.ever.
Black Lives Matter
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Blackhawk
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Re: Horrible Dreams and Wonderful Nightmares

Post by Blackhawk »

Sudy wrote: Wed Jun 09, 2021 8:14 pm He trimmed it shorter than I wanted, but the real issue was that he gave me blonde goldilocks curls and put long bright ribbons in my hair.
Were you Ladybaby?

(˙pǝsɹǝʌǝɹ uǝǝq sɐɥ ʎʇıʌɐɹƃ ʃɐuosɹǝd ʎW)
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Sudy
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Re: Horrible Dreams and Wonderful Nightmares

Post by Sudy »

It was more like Shirley Temple, but longer. And the ribbons were the long, thin ones more likely to be found on presents than in hair. That you curl by drawing them along a scissors blade. It was a distinct look, but I wasn't ready for it. This Ladybeard guy is far more comfortable with himself.

But like, what made you think this is what I wanted Eugene? He seemed so genial and sincere while I was in the barber's chair, but he totally ran off the rails with his styling choices.

I saw a commercial on late night TV. It said, "Forget everything you know about slipcovers." So I did. And it was a load off my mind. Then the commercial tried to sell me slipcovers, and I didn't know what the hell they were. -- Mitch Hedberg
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Isgrimnur
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Re: Horrible Dreams and Wonderful Nightmares

Post by Isgrimnur »

Blackhawk wrote: Wed Jun 09, 2021 10:54 pm
Sudy wrote: Wed Jun 09, 2021 8:14 pm He trimmed it shorter than I wanted, but the real issue was that he gave me blonde goldilocks curls and put long bright ribbons in my hair.
Were you Ladybaby?

It's Babybeard now.



It's almost as if people are the problem.
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Re: Horrible Dreams and Wonderful Nightmares

Post by LawBeefaroni »

Not exactly a dream but my dad recently had a biopsy under nitrous sedation. He later sent me a text from my mom's phone saying that I had to try "the gas" and that he had just walked a golf course while Rodney Dangerfield performed the biopsy.
" Hey OP, listen to my advice alright." -Tha General
"No scientific discovery is named after its original discoverer." -Stigler's Law of Eponymy, discovered by Robert K. Merton

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Kraken
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Re: Horrible Dreams and Wonderful Nightmares

Post by Kraken »

Last night I dreamed that I somehow accidentally got into OO's secret forum. I could see everything the mods were saying in private, and they had something to say about everyone. Except me. :(
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Isgrimnur
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Re: Horrible Dreams and Wonderful Nightmares

Post by Isgrimnur »

It's almost as if people are the problem.
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Re: Horrible Dreams and Wonderful Nightmares

Post by Kraken »

Most of my nightmares are about insecurity. Or tornadoes.
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