Does My Absolute Love of IKEA make me less of a Man?

[ATB]

It is, quite simply, the greatest store on planet earth. EVAR!

[godhugh]

No, but it calls into question your sanity. IKEA is the single WORST store I've ever seen.

[Jeff V]

No, but it calls into question your sanity. IKEA is the single WORST store I've ever seen.

I second this. My experience shopping there was absolutely horrible, and the merchandise broke down 2 months later.

[qp]

I just realized they have a $1 breakfast - I mean a full ass breakfast for $1, seems to be a ploy to allow my wife to entice me to go!

[Smoove_B]

If you're going to put their furniture together yourself, I hope you have advanced degrees in structural engineering and particle physics.

[LordMortis]

I had never heard of them, but they are opening one up right on the the entrance of the expressway that I take to work and have had construction fubaring that corner since November of last year. Lots of people around here seem to be excited about them opening. I'm sure I'll see what all of the hubbub is when they do open, but I don't tend to buy/collect/own stuff, so I'll spend my 15 minutes walking through the store and then go home.

$1 breakfast sounds good, though.

[Jeff V]

If you're going to put their furniture together yourself, I hope you have advanced degrees in structural engineering and particle board physics.

Fixed it for ya.

[Ronin]

yeah Ikea is great....

hideously overpriced and their furniture is ugly as shit.

[ChrisGrenard]

Isn't IKEA the company mentioned in Fight Club?

[Mr. Sparkle]

If you're going to put their furniture together yourself, I hope you have advanced degrees in structural engineering and particle physics.

To use an allen wrench? I hope my degree in engineering is worth more than that.

Ikea is the best cheap furniture there is... looks nice and can be put together by a braindead monkey... but ATB, I hope you realize that this furniture is made by godless Swedes who spit on the sacred institution of marriage. You might as well be making donations to an abortion clinic.

[JonathanStrange]

Does your "absolute love of IKEA make me less of a Man?"

Yes.

Yes, it does.

But only slightly. Since I don't know if how you act when you're in the store, I'll give you the benefit of the doubt: I'll assume you're not giddily saying things like "I simply must have this!" or "Isn't this darling?"

(My secret: I like those catalogs like Hold Everything or any furniture catalog; I think "Hmmmm, maybe I should get rid of the folding card table, lawn chairs, and cinder block shelves, throw away my empty beer can collection, and fix this place up" but then I just have another cold one.)

[killbot737]

Isn't IKEA the company mentioned in Fight Club?

The things you own end up owning you.

[El-Producto]

I think you should ask Kratzer's opinion.

[baron calamity]

It is, quite simply, the greatest store on planet earth. EVAR!

I too have a love of Ikea. I actually fine that men tend to like Ikea more than women. The style of the furniture is simplistic yet has nice angles, bright colors, and every piece seems to be designed with maximizing a room's space and increasing organization option in mind.

Plus the restaurant is very good considing the price.

The only negative I find is that the furniture will not last generations.

[Moggy123]

so I'll spend my 15 minutes walking through the store and then go home.

Good freaking luck. It'll take that long to get into the parking lot.

The two stores near me are always insanely busy. I think their stuff is shit, but it fulfills a "Now I'm out of college and have a place of my own, how the F*CK am I supposed to furnish this apartment" need out there.

[Napoleon]

In Holland, IKEA means cheap as shit furniture. Pretty? nah, not really, but when your budget-challenged, it's a nice store to go to.

So, I will be going to IKEA to buy furniture for my new apartment, as I have no money. If I had money, would I shop there? HELL NO.

The meatballs in the restaurant area are pretty damn tasty though

[ChaoZ]

I think IKEA's stuff looks good in their catalogue, but when you get it home, it looks and feels like crap.

Although my desk at home was from IKEA, and it has lasted a solid 15 years. I too, will likely be furnishing my first appartment with IKEA.

[LawBeefaroni]

I was there once. I got a $20 coffee table. They threw in 3 lbs. of frozen meatballs and sauce for free. When I got home I put the coffee table together and ate some meatballs. Both were good but I decided not to go back there again.

I think the shopping cart escalator is damn cool though.

[Larraque]

They have some pretty nice stuff for different price ranges. Personally, I find myself walking through the store and hating the design on about 95% of the furniture, but there are some pretty nice things. The bedroom armoires are really nice, and some of the display cabinets.

I think the only thing I've bought from them though is a plastic cutting board for the kitchen, a toilet brush, and an ice tray. All were very good quality.

[Mr. Sparkle]

In Holland, IKEA means cheap as shit furniture. Pretty? nah, not really, but when your budget-challenged, it's a nice store to go to.

It has the look of boutique trendy hip modern furniture that would costs 4-5 times as much... certainly you are getting much less quality, but:




The IKEA version should be obvious to anyone who knows anything about furniture... but the top one costs $1200, while the IKEA one costs $350... is it worth it? Not for me, unless I'm using Franklins to light my cigars.

And yes, I know I'm entering into YK/Smoove territory by posting pictures of Chaises... or knowing WTF a chaise is.

[LordMortis]

I want want one of those for TV watching and for reading. It probably would even eventually become my makeshift bed.

[Mr. Sparkle]

I want want one of those for TV watching and for reading. It probably would even eventually become my makeshift bed.

It's also perfect for getting fed grapes by slave girls.

[LordMortis]

I want want one of those for TV watching and for reading. It probably would even eventually become my makeshift bed.

It's also perfect for getting fed grapes by slave girls.

Hook me up. If I can get the for $350, I am all aboot it.

[Jeff V]

I want want one of those for TV watching and for reading. It probably would even eventually become my makeshift bed.

It's also perfect for getting fed grapes by slave girls.

Hook me up. If I can get the for $350, I am all aboot it.

Around here, the slave girls will run you about $350 for an hour.

[Mr. Sparkle]

I want want one of those for TV watching and for reading. It probably would even eventually become my makeshift bed.

It's also perfect for getting fed grapes by slave girls.

Hook me up. If I can get the for $350, I am all aboot it.

Around here, the slave girls will run you about $350 for an hour.

Yeah, I don't think the slave girls are included in the purchase price... but everyone knows that you can't have slave girls without a chaise, so really it's the first step to having dedicated servants that yell "Hail Ceasar!" when you come into your living room to watch the next episode of Amazing Race.

[gellar]

There are no words to describe my hatred for Ikea.

gellar

[LordMortis]

I want want one of those for TV watching and for reading. It probably would even eventually become my makeshift bed.

It's also perfect for getting fed grapes by slave girls.

Hook me up. If I can get the for $350, I am all aboot it.

Around here, the slave girls will run you about $350 for an hour.

Wow. You get off cheap.

[Dirt]

You could be Swedish.

[Eightball]

Isn't IKEA the company mentioned in Fight Club?

The things you own end up owning you.

"What best expresses me as a person"?

[hepcat]

Short answer?

Yes


Long answer?

Yes

[Octavious]

We bought a few things from there and I think you would have better luck getting me to donate my testicles to science tomorrow then getting me to go back to that god forsaken store. The parking lot is like 90 miles long. The store is setup so that it takes you 15 years to get through it. Half the stuff we bought broke within a month because it's built like crap and god forbid you need to ship stuff home!! Here's the steps I had take to get the closets for my bedroom.

1. Pick everysingle piece that I wanted in it... # of shelves, doors, glass for the doors, light for the top...Various other random crap.

2. Go up to some random guy standing at a computer in the middle of nowhere and walk him step by step, piece by f'n piece each item... He then procedes to give a us a list of where we have to pickup all the parts from the warehouse downstairs..

3. Go downstairs and pickup all the pieces we need to get from the list and bring it to the register. Some of these items are huge and heavy.

4. After being rung up on the register we have to go to another desk and fill out a form to have the items shipped to the house. And then finally we can go home...

NEVER AGAIN

[CeeKay]

Ikea? I mean, WTF mate? did they just throw a bunch of Boggle cubes into a bag, draw them randomly and then roll them to see what letters came up?

[Biyobi]

Does My Absolute Love of IKEA make me less of a Man?

No, but your disdain for pr0n does.

[LawBeefaroni]

Ikea? I mean, WTF mate? did they just throw a bunch of Boggle cubes into a bag, draw them randomly and then roll them to see what letters came up?

IKEA - founded by Ingvar Kamprad of Sweden. The name IKEA comes from a clever acronym using the initials of the founder, Ingvar Kamprad, who was from a family farm called Elmtaryd, which was near the village of Agunnaryd. The acronym is for a Swedish phrase but it turns out to be the same in English, Ingvar Kamprad's Economical Alternative.

And of course their product names are even better. There's the Jerker computer desk for all your pr0n needs and the Gutvik bed for children (gutvik literally translated from German is "good fuck").

[ChrisGwinn]

Isn't IKEA the company mentioned in Fight Club?

Yes, and it took me quite a while to get over this.

[Napoleon]

Does My Absolute Love of IKEA make me less of a Man?

No, but your disdain for pr0n does.

Very good!

[stessier]

I bought an Ikea bookcase. They offered delivery - great! It was expensive...but even with the shipping, it's still cheaper than getting a local option. They only deliver on Wed and Fri in my area and they call the day before with a 4 hour window. You have to be there the whole time - they can't narrow the window and won't call before arriving. Even if you are willing to schedule out in the future, they won't allow you to pick a window - you will get a call the day before and that's that. This is the stupidest thing I've ever heard of.

[coopasonic]

This is the stupidest thing I've ever heard of.

You must have lived a truly blessed life if that is true.

[Smoove_B]

When I was selling my house they did the smoke detector inspection one day a week in a 90 minute window. And that mother f'er showed up at minute 89 the first time and then an entire week later (when I failed) at minute 89 to do the re-inspection.

I ordered two IKEA shelves over the summer and had them delivered for the same reasons - cheaper than driving to only retail site in NJ to get them. Even with waiting, still worth it.

[AWS260]

There's a company in my area that built its entire business around delivering from IKEA, because people dislike their in-house delivery service so much.